(They always say) So many studies say that Finances=Fights in marriages and unfortunately (it's true) many divorces.  I just wish that all those involved in divorce could have been educated a little more and been willing to give it more time and another chance because I bet a large majority of those could have been avoided if they had really learned how to simply work together on (but) finances=result of major stress reduction=a saved marriage in several cases! 

I'm always excited to share a resource when I find one and this time it's a Biblical Perspective on Finances.  If you haven't heard of Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University yet, then I encourage you to take a long hard LISTEN!  My husband and I have yanked the control back and forth from each other due to exhaustion over arguing and being accused of being the reason for our tough luck for the first 6 years of our marriage, but the first day I was asked to listen to Dave's radio show...we were SUDDENLY on the same page.  We both completely agreed with him, no doubt so we better get with it and do whatever he suggests if that's the only way we are going to agree.  So we did and we've been putting some tools in practice for the last year or more and we finally have PEACE in our marriage.  It is amazing how much STRESS this one things adds to your marriage.  Phew!  And we just began Financial Peace University two weeks ago and it's a 13 week session, but we are excited to implement the rest of what we haven't done yet and make sure we really get the hang of it.  All this to say, PLEASE make the effort to look at your finances TOGETHER so that hopefully you can eliminate some unnecessary added stress on your relationship!  The goal is so that you can live and have enough to give.  Malachi 3:10 - if we are good care-takers of our finances, we will have bountiful blessings to offer to the Lord AND our missions we have passion for!

This is the first year that my husband and I have purposefully implemented a "Service Advent Calendar" and it was such a blessing!  It is hard NOT to think about Jesus and what He did for us when you are serving others for an entire month!  It was inspired last year and I didn't take the time to get organized to make it happen, but this year it was SO worth the organization and of course it wasn't nearly as overwhelming to find service acts as I made it out to be last year!  Thank you Lord for helping us make this Season all about YOU!  Matthew 1:21

One wonderful thing for me that has come about from not having kids in our home for a season...is experiencing my own Advent.  I have had so many overwhelmingly precious experiences this year with strangers and I'm finding more Joy than ever.  I will never know the full story of these strangers I am crossing paths with, but I am being blessed with every encounter and so thankful to provide these gifts to Jesus for his birthday this year!  I have come across some sweet poems I want to share, Merry Christmas!

My Gift by Lucille Crumley
What do I want for Christmas?
Lord, set one bright star apart
And let me lift to it this night
An awed and childlike heart.

The Birds by Isla Paschal Richardson
They say there is a lesson
In everything we see;
Two new ones I have learned today,
The birds have shown to me.

One lesson is of trustfulness...
I watch them come and go
And they never seem to worry,
Though the ground is white with snow.

The other one is happiness...
They sing the whole day long;
It makes you feel like singing
Just to hear their happy song.

We found a new FAVORITE thing to do!  I knew my husband would turn into a small town boy before long:)  He's always liked small towns because I'm from one, but I wasn't sure how he'd like living in one where everybody knows your name!!!  BUT we served at the Annual Town Thanksgiving Community Dinner and had a blast, we bussed tables for the entire 3 hours.  It was so much fun.  We already plan to do this next year and are looking forward to what else we can find to do this holiday season. 

I encourage you to be a bride to whoever you can this holiday season and let it be about more than just your family.  It becomes about your family when you learn how important it is to serve others who don't have what you have all year long!  Galatians 5:13-26

Many of us women love to organize every detail of the house and make sure all are cared for, but often times this means we are also saying too much and going overboard so that our husband is not left alone to take care of his duties without our barging in, you know who you are:) ~Well, I'm one of those women too and I'm not proud of it.  It's something I am constantly working on, but I have relaxed too much on "working on it" for the last year or so.  I have discovered that it is a perfect definition of not submitting and as a result turns my husband into a helpless soul who doesn't seem to get anything right...according to MY standards.  That's when I had to say WHOA there cowgirl, you need to get back in the saddle of God right now!  Ephesians 4:16

Remember the 5 Love Languages?  Well, if you've never heard of that book, you better find it real quick and read it!  I read this book nearly a decade ago and the simplicity of it applies to everyday life and to every person you love.  People need to "hear" I love you in 5 different ways and they way you need to be loved may not be the way everyone around you needs to be loved so they may not feel your love even though YOU think you are overflowing with it.  I called my Dad about a week ago, out of the blue, and let him know how thankful I am for the loyalty he has created among his children and what a special bond we have even though we may not always act like it.  I could genuinely feel, even over the phone, that this was a screaming I LOVE YOU to my Daddy!  This made me feel all the more special in return because I feel like I FINALLY figured that man out!!!!!! SHHH, don't tell him, but I think I might finally have his number:)  Figure out someone special's love language today, you'll be glad you did and you won't even realize how easy it is to be a Bride of Christ to them without effort!  Have a wonderful Memorial Day Weekend with family and friends and remember the reason we celebrate this beloved holiday. Psalm 16:9

I'm bummed it's been so long since I last wrote, but I'm not bummed for the reasons why:)  I have been enjoying the beauty of seeing my husband live his life as a bride!  We got our first placement as Foster Parents and my husband has fallen into the role of Dad SO well, what a beautiful thing.  We have really loved this opportunity and look forward to the next placement as we just heard this sibling set will be going back to their birth mom.  We're bummed we don't get more time with them (only 3 months), but we sure are happy that they are getting what their little hearts desire and pray that it will be nothing but positive!  What great kids that we will always remember!  I may not get to have them with me on this Mother's Day, but I sure am proud to say I am a mother now and wonder how many children God will have in store for my lifetime since it's just beginning!  Happy Mother's Day to all the Mommas out there...we come in all shapes, styles, names and types!  May you be blessed this weekend and always, knowing you HAVE made a difference!  1 Chronicles 4:8-10

It seems so surreal.  My husband heard on the news on November 29th that there had been six soldiers killed and what a horrific story of betrayal by those our men are training.  After he shared the story with me, we both thought what a sad story.  Then two days later I got the news that my friend's son had been killed in Afghanistan and when sharing the tears and story with my husband, we realized the connection.  What heartbreak we felt since I knew this soldier's father. 

We attended the memorial service today and what a day!  I remember when the soldier's father got the news a couple years ago that his son was called to war and we shared tears then of fear of the unknown.  No matter how scared this father was, he was so proud that his son had made the decision to volunteer and even more proud was that soldier when I had the honor of meeting him in uniform before he was deployed!  That proud father was still proud today and can live life knowing that his son sacrificed for all of us and knew what he was doing all along the way.  That young man is a Christian and to hear EVERY person talk during the service let his WALK with the Lord shine right through their stories without any need to say, he did it because he was Christian.  I think every person in that service knew, he did it because he wanted to live like Jesus and to do that, you live like Jesus...showing so much love and compassion to your immediate family all the way to your entire country you are fighting for!  I am forever thankful to this young man and will NEVER forget the impact and respect I never knew I have for every person who fights for our country.  THANK YOU.  Romans 8:28 was the verse of the day at the service.

WOW! Today my parents celebrate 41 years! I am so happy to hear them so joyful about it. My mom says they took their vows seriously, till death do us part.
Well, we are only at the beginning of our journey, but I am so thankful to have a marriage to learn from in my direct reflections in life.  We recently got our photos taken together for the first time and I'm glad we waited because now I can always remember how mature we have gotten by this point in life and what sincere joy we have found in each other and never earlier on could I have felt that our photos were so genuine.  I love my husband and it's only because of my other groom that we are where we are...Jesus Christ!  And soon we will get to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS! Have a great month celebrating with your family and loved ones why our life can be so peaceful!

I spent the weekend at a Christmas Craft Fair with To Be A Bride as the focus for my booth!  It was a wonderful event where nearly 100 more people got introduced to this blog!  It was definitely different this time since most people were church attendees.  It was so fun to encourage women who think they've got it all together to bless other women with their encouragement.  That's what it's all about, a grass roots movement from those who care about each person, to keep our marriages more than going, but growing stronger and stronger.

I've never encountered so many women who think they have perfect marriages where nothing needs to change.  Well THAT'S GREAT because a lot of women CAN'T say that, but I say don't stop at yourself, share your experiences because there are many women who could use the encouragement, so keep an eye out!  AND ALSO, there is always something we can improve on so don't be afraid to look for better ways to treat your spouse, more things you could do for your spouse, ways to encourage your spouse and lift them up, etc.  Romans 12 

My husband taught me a lesson in listening this week:)  We were sharing about our life around the house and he mentioned that he feels bad on the days that I get up to go to work earlier than him and I fix him breakfast before I leave and get home just in time to make dinner...And on a good day, I'll remember to make him a lunch to take with him too.  I LOVE doing this because working out of the home is not ideal for me, but since I can't be home, I want to do all I can to serve him so he will notice I'm gone as little as possible.  So I told him not to feel bad because I love serving him like this.  Since I can't serve him all day long in the home, it's one of the joys I can still have even though I'm working outside the home.

Well, this morning it was my husband's turn to get up and go to work early and I usually lay there groggy, but awake to talk in case he wants to.  So he looked over at me, saw my eyes open and asked, "Are you wide awake?" to which I responded, "Yeah, pretty much."  So he then asked, "Would you make me some breakfast to take with me?"  "Of course," so I jumped out of bed and then realized I guess I wasn't as awake as I thought I was, but collected myself and joyously made my husband a breakfast bowl he could eat in the car on his way to work. 

Then I thought about it, HE HEARD ME this week when I told him how it brings me joy to serve him, never mind that it's a couple hours later when I usually do it, I would never turn him down!  Thank you Lord that my husband can ask me to serve him and that I can give with a happy heart.  I love you Lord and it's all because of the joy you fill me with that allows it to overflow onto my husband!  Deuteronomy 16:15

The most common thing I say is: Live your life as a Bride to both your husband and Jesus Christ, you'll be glad you did!  But when things actually happen and remind me that this is true, WOW, I still get blown away. I am so thankful for how the Lord works (Isaiah 55:8-9).  I live my life striving to be a Proverbs 31 woman and it is such a precious feeling to learn that it is possible, little by little.  I used to think no woman could be all that, but if you just keep trying and keep relying on your faith in God and keep trying to live like Jesus, you TOO will begin feeling that you are fulfilling your calling in life as a wife!

What joy it brings me to encourage my husband, talk wonderfully of him (Proverbs 31:23), treat him well and serve him generously rather than being selfish with my time, mind and body to get what I want in life...it's not easy, but if you make it a habit then on those hard days it just happens because you only know how to treat him with love and respect.  I'm still a major work in progress, but I am already receiving the benefits from this unselfish living.  My husband now wants to please ME, encourage ME, talk wonderfully to ME, treat ME well and serve ME generously for what have long been the desires of my heart.  I just had to wait according to God's timing. 

Obviously this dog has been being a bride to this kitty or there is no way this kitty would let this GREAT BIG DOG this close! A lesson in trust:) Enjoy.

My sweet Mama taught me to keep a prayer journal a few years ago when I was having some trying times. She encouraged me that it would only help my relationship with the Lord and if I would try to keep it up, it would become an ongoing delight to keep it up.  Well, part of this journal is to go back and write in dates prayers were answered or updates to situations or questions/comments/and other documentation about a prayer request.  I don't write down EVERY SINGLE prayer I pray, just ones that strike me as a goal in life or a struggle to overcome or something that I need to improve on with my spiritual walk.  If you have not started one, I encourage you to do so today and don't make it a HUGE thing that you want to commit to writing in it daily or even weekly, just as often as you have something really touch your heart and then it's easier to stick with it!
All this to preface an absolute ANSWER to prayer for me this week!!! I am so unbelievably thankful and to many it may not seem like much, but because I know the things that have been prayed for around this request, the trials that have been on this path and the hurdles I have overcome in strengthening my relationship with Jesus AND my husband...I PRAISE God for answered prayer.  My husband and I just began attending a Bible Study TOGETHER and what a precious relief for both of us.  It's so wonderful to hear how only the first night worked on both our hearts and that the Lord's timing was PERFECT for both of us to finally join together in this precious journey.  Proverbs 31:12

I walked away from ANOTHER Bridal Show feeling so blessed and thankful. Every time I prepare for one of these shows, I am overwhelmed by the generosity of people donating books because they too want to see marriages succeed and if this is something we can do together, they want to be a part of it!  Every single book that is offered and received at the ToBeABride booth is given and taken because of a story and a need. Thank you so much to those of you who continue to reach into your resources to donate books for these booths, your offering is a blessing to all who walk by.  2 Chronicles 31

To read more about ToBeABride shows/booths "on the road," visit the following links:
 ToBeABride Hit The Road!
 ToBeABride Hit The Road Again!
 Bridal Show Attending

Coming up soon is another Bridal Show, please start praying with me now that those who need a book will walk my way and not be afraid to stop.  September 12th is a day I have been waiting for since the last bridal show I attended in January.  Lord, use me, fill me with your love and speak your kind words of encouragement through me for those who cross my path at this upcoming bridal show.  Thank you to all who have donated books for my booth, you are touching lives right along side ToBeABride.com!  Philippians 4.

I have been so blessed this week!  My nephew has taught me unselfishness this week and is so EAGER to listen to Christian Music when we're getting in the car, pray at night, give money whenever he can to good causes!  He gave his heart to the Lord on our drive down and then I've been able to spend a whole week with him, precious time.  I've been seeing first hand a child-like faith all week and this little guy has been learning how to live life as a BRIDE!  I've definitely learned a thing or two:)  Matthew 19:14

I just got home from such a touching sermon about SERVING and there were three examples given about the lives lived by three people or 4 I guess and they were so amazingly touching...and I never knew these people and I was attending this church for the first time.  God wanted me there today because those three people have impacted my life and make me want to SERVE my heart out! 

I miss SERVING and it has been too long since I've SERVED regularly, okay I take that back :) I serve regularly in my home and I do not take that away from SERVING at all for all you wonderful women who stay at home and take care of your kids and home.  That's what I want to do when I have children as well and I have been fortunate enough to work from home for the past three years and what a blessing it has been!  But I want to do more.  I think as we mature in our faith, we become more efficient with our time and ability to bless others.  I think I've reached another level of love and faith and I want to give more and I have a couple opportunities coming up that I can't wait to see what the Lord has in store with them.  Use me Lord, I want to SERVE and show others what a blessing it is to be part of your BRIDE!  The theme of the sermon this morning was Ephesians 2:10.

I have been absolutely down in the dumps lately and there are just some people who you know you have in your life that you avoid because they will make you get that yucky attitude out of your system.  For me it's my Mom and a couple Christian friends...well, I'm SO thankful for my friend who slapped me around the other night...okay so maybe she didn't slap me, but she showered me with prayers and what a blessing it was!  I have had a completely different attitude and outlook on what I need to improve upon in my life.  Thank you Lord that my friend was such a Bride to me and let your love shine through when I needed it most.  I love you.  1 Kings 8:37-39

I was at a professional networking mixer tonight and was touched by a friend when she mentioned how she had shown appreciation to Father's today in celebration of Father's Day.  She chose her top 10 clients who were Dads and presented them with a thank you in person for all they do in life for their children, a small token of appreciation good for any man - a hamburger flipper with a fish de-scaler and bottle cap remover attached for the male multi-tasker!  Try to think outside the box this Father's Day to thank your Dad and really let him know that he is one of a kind!  Matthew 19:19

I had the best birthday this year, it was such a sweet precious time with great girlfriends...and their husbands!  I am so thankful that I have such sweet precious friends, but I'm even more thankful that all of them are in beautiful marriages and talk kindly of their husbands.  I am very encouraged to have friends that appreciate their husbands, what a blessing to be surrounded by such women on a day celebrating my life.  I turned 30 this year and felt like it was a year to celebrate.  My husband does a great job every year to not only make me feel special on my birthday, but he gives me a birthday week.  This year we joked about me throwing myself a surprise birthday party because I love to plan parties, but then I thought why not?  I do love to plan and who better to make my birthday exactly the way I want it, but ME!  Well, it was beautiful:)  My husband came home in plenty of time to make sure I didn't need any last minute help, several of my girlfriends were able to attend, we had a beautiful picnic down by the beach in gorgeous weather and no wind, the guys stayed down to play on the beach with the children while the girls went back up to our house to make soy-candles and then we wrapped it up with the guys and kids returning.  It was so beautiful to see the families that surround us as well as friends who have passed that stage in life and were there as beautiful "brides" setting an example with peace, patience and kindness all during the party when the silly girls were laughing immaturely!  I will never forget this day and how each of you showed me the "brides" I want to be...to my husband, to my future children, as a mother-in-law, as a mentor and as a life-long friend.  Thank you Dorothy, Sol, Tanya, Mary, Diane, Alyssa and Carolyn!  Galations 5:13

Lord, I pray for you to continue using me beyond my comfort level to share about YOU!  I am going through something SO awesome right now and God has given me multiple opportunities to praise Him in front of my family during the process.  The tough part is that these family members are unbelievers so there is never an easy time to share what God is doing, but it is SO obvious right now and I believe it is making an impact!  I can't wait to share more, but will hold off for now:)

Please keep my husband and I in your prayers as we begin an unforgettable journey in life!  Draw us close to you God and all those who end up as part of this process.  We love you, praise you and thank you, in Jesus' name-AMEN.  Matthew 19:14

Don't EVER let ANYBODY let you think they have the whole marriage thing down, no matter how perfect they seem as a couple in front of you. Things go on behind doors in EVERY marriage.  There are a couple MAIN things to keep in mind:

You are the ONLY one who knows BOTH sides of your marriage (your spouse does too, but I mean for people you will ever talk to or consult about your marriage)

Once you evaluate your marriage appropriately, you really need to decide whether you are IN or you are OUT and STICK with that decision otherwise it's not fair to yourself, your spouse or your kids to go up and down up and down emotionally...I know we should have made this decision when we said our wedding vows, but things change and people change after that day UNFORTUNATELY.

Are you and/or your spouse Christians and how is your RELATIONSHIP with Jesus Christ? Not just attending church or doing prayers, but your direct relationships with Jesus Christ? You both need to have this relationship on your own before any marriage can work the way marriage was made to work. So if one or both of you is not close to Jesus Christ then 1st YOU need to become a Christian, I can help you do that if you want and 2nd YOU need to live a life as a beautiful bride so that your spouse will be drawn to that lifestyle.  This is THE determining factor in your marriage along with knowing that YOU are the ONLY thing you can change.
Hopefully these are some good things to think about:) I Corinthians 7:12-16

What would I have to do to get you to see that Jesus Christ is real?

Once you see that Jesus Christ is real, would you be willing to surrender your life to Him?

Jesus died on the cross for our sins, according to scripture...
He was buried and then rose from the dead, according to scripture...
He's alive and living in me and can live in you as well.

What are you going to do with that information?

Please read John 3:16. I love you!